glass of water.

Minute 1: I'm full! I have my entire future ahead of me! I have so many possibilities! Perhaps I will quench the thirst of a top athlete, or maybe I'll get thrown onto someone in disgust... I know that's usually an alcoholic beverage, but I have a chance, right? I feel cold. I feel good. I can feel the condensation forming around me! Such a nice feeling, I don't want it to ever go away!

Minute 15: So, as it turns out... I belong to some random girl in a restaurant. Not the most exciting thing in the world, but it could be worse! At least she's had a few sips of me! I don't know if it's because she's actually thirsty, or because this date of hers is as awkward as a bald llama. This is going to be fun!

Minute 20: She went to the restroom. I'm just kind of sitting here now, I hope I didn't make her have to go. I don't think water works that quickly... But who am I to say? I'm just a glass. Anyway, I've been checking out this glass of wine from across the room. She has a nice shape to her. After we're washed tonight, I might make my move.

Minute 45: She eventually came back and drank most of me. Really all that is left is some ice. Such is life I guess, as least I'm not living this post as the water itself! Otherwise this would be the end! I'd be dead! But... I'm not. *Whistle* Wait, did I do that or... oh, he's trying to impress her with that old trick? Good try buddy, but this girl ain't interested... and I'd appreciate it if you take your filthy hands off of me.

Minute 59: Goodbye lady! Thank you for finishing the water inside of me, I may not feel quite as fresh as I did earlier, but that's okay! There's always tomorrow. And hello there... I couldn't help but notice you from across the restaurant. Yes, yes I am free tonight. What kind of stuff did you have in mind?

Minute 60: This is a lovely view. I always enjoy the trip back to the kitchen and washroom. I remember this one time that the waitress almost dropped me! It was crazy, thought I was going to die. That would be a terrible way to die you know? That entire trek down... just knowing that you're going to shatter into pieces and cause someone great pain and grief... ah...